Family

Have you ever love somebody? As a human being, the needs to love or to be loved is crucial. That's why family, friends, and our lover seems important. But who to put first? If you are single, you only got family and friends, right. Of course you would prioritize your family, you suppose to do so. But sometimes it's not that simple. We have desire, we have ego. yes, we have EGO.. and i have a big one. hahahahahaha

So, simply said that i always put my mom and dad first. and now let's talk about family. When i was a kid, do i feel loved? yes, they give me clothes, books, food, toys, and many others..the put me to good school, apply to a good course, introduce me to a good circle. do i get the benefit? yes, of course. i know my parents work so hard to give me all of this. And now, i'm getting much older. the questions still the same. do i feel loved? ...now that's a question! not really feel the loved... as time flies, the rules seems to strict, the barrier seems to stiff. i want to extent, i want to break all of this. so the answer is no, i don't feel loved. reason is, i don't get what i demand, i don't get what i feel i must have. being loved means you got what you want, what you deserve....does that sounds wrong?am I wrong?

since i grow, something just seem to appear. well truth is, everything seems to unveil. problems, problems, problems. when i was a kid, i think family is just a word for mom and dad. now, family means a lot more. feelings, relation, respect, and above all : reality. family is so complicated, it seems like i can't untie this bundle of problems that intertwine and so so so frustrating. since i grow, i have to deal with my own problems, and family problems, and many other problems. hahahahahaha.

now i realize, if i say i'm not loved, why don't i ask to my self, did i already love others? did i love them enough? today i learn, if i grow up, it's payback time. it's time to love your parents even more. it's time to show the love. when i was a kid, i show the love by obeying rules, by giving a perfect score. today i love my family by nurturing, by not complaining, by being there all the time.

all this problems taught me how to love. it taught me how important family is, how a child can be a big big big treasure and how parents are even more priceless. i am not a perfect child, sometimes i'm being self-centered. but i promise you, i will try, i will learn, i will love my family. yes dad, I Love You